Jubilant Jaguars_Simone de Lacy, Lesley Eagles, Patty ‘Poo’ Schofield and Tracey Simpson

THE LADIES – All eight distinguished dartesses registered for entry at El Capitan, when they eventually found it!  Marie Cummins skidded in on her killer black stilettoes with not a minute to spare as did the ever lovely Leah Chesworth in her bespangled thongs.  The Hub’s blonde Bob-shells clicky-clacked down the wooden stairs in their Manolo Blahnik’s, Jimmy Choos and Christian Louboutin’s to give support for their very own Lesley Dolling and the Hen’s chicks surrounded their heroin, Casey, for a night that would turn out to be pitched against the four feisty felines from the Junction Jaguars. 

Brian (Gnasher) Nash and Peter (Tufty) Ayres from the Porters oversaw a fair draw and did all the chalking and score keeping for the night which made it easier for the ladies to just concentrate on their arrows.


Up first was Jaguar de Lacy (73, D11; 100, 92, S20-D10) against Hellraiser Dolling (96, 79) and the first of the jags were through to the Semi’s.  Next came Tracey Simpson (70, D20; 100, 95, D2) against racy Casey Shaddock (81, 100, 84) of the Hen’s Chicks. The semi’s now had two Jag’s involved.  The third game of the quarters saw Pint Depot Queen Marie Dunne (76, 95) face the diminutive but deadly Lesley Eagles (98, 70, D9; 00, 100, D18) and the latter slid into the 3rd spot for the semi’s which just left the last Jaguar Patty Poo Schofield (85, 82, D20; 80, 125, 76, D5) to defeat Misfit Leah Chesworth (77, 121) to make it a clean sweep for the gals from El Galan.


Well, it was going to be a Jaguar one way or another and de Lacy took the first leg (83, 95, D1) from Simpson (85, 125).  The latter was not about to roll over though and took the next leg on D1 and the final leg on her favourite D10 despite a valiant effort from de Lacy (83, 79, 100) who also got down to the finish.  Lelly Bear Eagles then faced team mate Captain Poo and took the first leg on D3.  But like Simpson, Patty Poo wanted victory and upped her game 80, 100, D20 and then 79, 78, D9 to see herself into the finals even though ‘Lelly Bear EAGLES!’ gave a good fight with 85, 94, 81, 97 and was also down to the finish, but was thwarted once more by that wretched D2!


When you get through to the finals you can expect some cracking darts and Simpson and Schofield didn’t disappoint even though there were only team mates de Lacy and Eagles to watch! Patty Poo took the first leg 100, 80, D1 even though Simpson was ahead and looking likely to snatch it.  Well 3 chewing gums, a fresh beer and some ear phones later and Simpson got down to business. 

She pounded the 20’s relentlessly with 80, 81, 100, 80 to set herself up on a D1 checkout in the 2nd leg versus Poo’s 70, 76, 76.  She was at it again in the 3rd leg too with 83, 80, D14 to Poo’s 70, 81.  But Poo’s patience and persistence paid off and she took leg 4 with D8 despite another two 80’s from a simpering Psycho.  With steam coming from her ears she couldn’t quite come to the boil before Poo took the 5th and final leg with D9.

Winner: Pat Schofield (Junction Jaguars), Runner up: Tracey Simpson (Junction Jaguars)

Semi-finalists: Simone de Lacy (Junction Jaguars), Lesley Eagles (Junction Jaguars)

THE MEN – All the chaps in the final eight met at the Hub for the show-down, this being a neutral venue for all, as surprisingly this year there were no Hyenas through to the last rounds. In a rowdy atmosphere that required nerves of steel and ear plugs, apparently, players from Massey’s, Tavern, Junction, Hen’s Teeth, El Capitan and Porter House Bees did their level best to earn the ultimate prize of the darts season: – the coveted Men’s Singles Trophy.


The first pairing was a clash of the Golden Grahams which saw Graham White of the Hen’s Coqs face Graham Parker of the PH Bees, who started at he meant to go on for the evening by hitting the bullseye to decide who threw first.  Well according to the score sheets it was the latter all the way, taking leg 1: 125, S19-D20 and then the 2nd with a 121, D10 send him buzzing into the Semi’s. 

Des Field checked out on the first leg T16-D16 and then D1 on the 2nd leg to put Phil de Lacy up the Junction. Local lad, Graham Solomon, from the bar next door but one, made El Capitan Ed Klimonis walk the plank with a 2-0 game which didn’t record any high scores, just finishes of D12 and D8. Finally, Mr Miller of Massey’s won the last pairing against El Cap’s David Rotella, with a fine check out in the 2nd leg of T17-D15 making it an early night for the boys from yonder.


Into the next round and Mr Parker did not drop a single leg against opponent Des Field in a best of 5 leg game.  In Leg 1 he checked out on 52 (20-16-D18) in leg 2 he had an amazing 103 finish of T19-S19-D18 and in leg 3 he scored a 121 and ended on D2.  Des also managed a 111 in the final leg but that was water of a ducks back to Point-Precise Parker.  But it was not all doom and gloom for the Massey’s lads as Craig Miller managed a 3-1 defeat of Graham Solomon of the Tavern. 

The later started off very well with 140, 120 and D2 and then scored a 121 in the 2nd but Miller’s fine finishing saw him claim the next 3 legs with S7-S18-D20 followed by S16-D16 in the next and then finally S20-D18 for the 3rd one to take him through to the finals


Well Parker was on fire as he loaded his exocets and hit home in the best of 7 finale.  Miller scored a 135 in the first leg but parker matched this with 123 and closed it down on D10.  In the 2nd of what was to be just 4 legs, he chalked up a 121 and a S17-D20 finish. In the third he pulled off another 103 signature finish- perhaps hence forth to be known as ‘The Parker’ ticking of the final 103 again with T19-10-D18. 

Hub host Simon Williams with Craig Miller (Runner Up) and Graham Parker (Winner)

In the final leg, both players scored a 140 but it was too late for a comeback for Miller when Graham parked his last two arrows in S1-D2 for the match. Very well played Mr Parker, who we shall ask to lead off the dancing on presentation night with Ladies Winner Patty Poo Schofield.  I expect they are already practicing their routine.

Winner: Graham Parker (PH Bees), Runner Up: Craig Miller (Massey’s)

Semi Finalists: Des Field (Massey’s), Graham Solomon (Tavern

A big thank you to all our volunteer chalkers, results-keepers and El Capitan and the Hub for hosting the competitions and making it a great night.


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